surgery was interesting. but most everyone heard that story already....and they all know how i'm compulsively bleeding from the throat area. but that's alright. don't you hate it when you are in a super just depressed mood and you look at old pictures of you being happy and goofy and you're like.....where the hell did that go? when did i become this miserable person who dwells on a guy who isn't worth shit? when did i lose all respect for myself and my wants and needs? when did i stoop down to being with some one i love more than life....but he doesn't feel the same? in all honesty....i would rather be with some one who loves me like there's no tomorrow, who worships me and treats me like i'm queen of the world.....even if i wasn't completely head over heels for them..... it's so much better than being in love with some one who isn't in love with you. and that's what i need to come to terms with....he is not in love with me. and i need to get over that and move on.....is this possible? WE shall SEEE.